You really must come over and meet Troy. He is the sweetest little guy ever.
Sorry I haven’t written before, but I am hard at work on the chemistry set. Mom is pretty close to being 43 now and she just has no time to deal with her aging issue. I figured I would help out seeing as I am the man of the house now.
Dear Mom and Dad,
Although we adore Troy, we cannot wait for his birthday.
We are all missing meals trying to keep up with all the pets.
All the toilets are broken. Poor Carson keeps flooding the downstairs toilet. I keep meaning to fix everything, I just don’t have the time.
It did not take the last roommate long to find a new mate. This one also has two children already. I feel bad to not even get an invitation to the wedding, but oh well. I hope they are happy together.
I got up super early this morning, but I don’t know why.
Mom will be so surprised when she wakes up to find out that Ellen got potty trained and Troy had his breakfast already.
Mom got up late today and got started teaching Ellen to walk.
Carson swore he could hear their tummy’s growl all the way down in the basement.
Mom had to deal with “that damn dog” so, I got Ellen starting to talk. I had to stop for a trip to the ER. I guess Carson blew himself and half the basement up.
Ellen learned to talk later that night. The doctors did a full workup on Carson and he was sent home with a prescription for ice cream and a shower.
I blew up the basement! It was AMAZING! Mom had a cow though. Ellen is having her birthday four days early! I am so sick and tired of hearing how wonderful and smart she is.
Mom made me stand for this picture. She said we can send another one in a few days after I go to the beauty shop. She thinks I look too much like a boy.
Kendall Tanner (my prom date) calls all the time. I still have not gotten a new dress and mom has been too busy. Can I stop by after school and have you take me shopping?
I am almost ready to take the family on vacation. We will go the morning after prom. Judith blew a gasket when I said we were leaving tonight. That’ll teach her to not tell me she has plans! Thanks for agreeing to take her shopping tomorrow after school. She is very excited. Please make sure she dresses appropriately.
Dear SIMply Fresh,
Your toothpaste is not minty enough. I want a refund. Please mail it 20 years into the future.
I can’t wait till this afternoon!
We saw mom dancing around the house whooping and hollering. I think she was excited to have an empty house.
You were right! Traipsing around in the snow in my underwear did catch Kyle’s attention. I do believe I need a nipple transplant though.
We thoroughly enjoyed the newest park attraction.
Kyle got really upset. He had forgotten to tell me he was engaged to some old bat. Too bad she had the unfortunate accident soon after.
Ellen gave Troy his last bottle and he had his birthday. I am giving you first choice on adding him to your family. Please stop by at your earliest convenience.
Dear Mom and Dad,
No, I am not currently looking for a new roommate. Kyle is just friend. He stopped by to see Troy but found the video games instead.
He then read Ellen to sleep.
He then saw Troy and danced around clapping. He cannot wait until Troy is trained and ready to go home with him.
p.s. I think I love him.
Mom says I cannot go to prom unless I go in a gunny sack. Please talk to her.
Thanks for taking all of the kids shopping. I still cannot believe you let Judith get that tiny thing you call a dress.
I won the argument and now I can wear the dress tomorrow.
The excitement has me forgetting how to do the simplest of things. Poor Troy thinks I am a moron now.
Today is the summer holiday and I spent my day getting Troy trained.
Mom was caught doing Mr. Valdez at the park. The whole town is now talking about how she is knocked up again. Of course, that didn’t stop her from chatting up some purply pink dude either.
I wish i had known that we were selling Troy as soon as he was trained. I am so sad now.
Mom came home late from the party at Mr. Valdez’s house. I guess his hot tub is “simply amazing.”
Carson will be having his birthday tomorrow. He thinks it will be just in time to go to prom. I made dinner tonight and didn’t burn it! I’m so proud of myself.
Mom finally figured out who was eating all the newspapers.
Carson did not want his picture taken. Can you tell? I made fun of his fake smile all night after this.
Kendall showed up for prom, but then immediately got into his fancy expensive car and left.
I was a little angry at first, but I got over it and went to have a good time anyway. Kendall showed up late, after Carson and I got our crowns. He asked me to go steady and then gave me my first kiss! We also caught Carson making out with Sherry, a girl in our class!
Of course, nothing beats what mom did that night. Women who barely sleep and puke all the time should not be in charge. Now we have Misty #2, Myra and Baby to take care of.
Cash really angered mom today while I was at school. I guess he was chasing the mailman.
I wondered why Ellen was not on the bus this morning, but it never occurred to me that she would be dumb enough to skip on a field trip day. Mom was so mad!
I got called up to the office. It seems mom went into labor and wanted me to go straight home after school. That ruined my plans to go to Kendall’s house. I got word that he had aged up and I wanted to wish him a Happy Birthday.
Yes, I know I haven’t written, but I think Judith did a great job of keeping you in the loop.
The new baby is a boy named Seth.
He is pretty wonderful and super smart.
Kyle showed up at the hospital and held my hand through the delivery. Later, he bought Troy and stuck around for a bit watching Carson teach the baby to walk.
While everyone was busy, I finally had a moment to call the adoption agency. They showed up within an hour to take Cash to a home that wanted to deal with him.
Everyone went to sleep and somehow Ellen talked Kyle into reading to her again. He left soon after that since it was almost 3am.
Nobody even heard Seth! I have no clue what time he woke up.
But it must have been a long time because his voice was hoarse when Carson finally got to him at 8.
The poor kid. I woke up to him screaming and kicking my bedroom door.
I cleaned while he had his bottle. Then we spent the rest of the day on his last two skills.
Time seems to be flying by. Ellen turned out amazing, but I knew she would. Her and Judith look a lot a like.
Like Ellen, Seth aged up four days early. I am not looking forward to another round of bedtime stories though!
Author Note: (2014) Troy born with only a level 10 jumping skill. He made it up to level 5 or 6 racing with Judith. His stud fee was about $1921 and he sold for $9610, our lowest yet.
I finally beat Carson at a game of chess.
Mom was practically giddy while we discussed her strange behavior.
The next day the foals all made an appearance. Baby went first and brought forth yet another boy. He had barely any of Indigo’s markings, but what surprised us was that he was a unicorn.
Misty #2 went next with another boy.
Then Myra did the impossible. She finally brought forth a filly. Sixth times a charm, I guess.
Indigo was especially happy that night. He blessed me right before I put him to bed for the night. The next day, mom was singing around the house and got us all to clean up.
She then surprised us with a trip! We were all so excited that we never even got dressed after our naps!
I’ll write while we’re gone!
*tears cover the letter* I find it hard to write this letter.
We arrived safely and it was so amazing.
The time traveler guide was creepy and kept drooling over mom.
He told her to fly around on the jetpack, and she jumped at the chance at trying something new.
Me and Seth watched her having so much fun, that we decided we wanted to do it too.
Then we heard a weird grinding noise and Mom started falling from the sky. Seth started screaming– or maybe it was me. I can’t remember.
The crash was loud. There was fire everywhere. We both expected her to be a bit crispy, but alive.
But she wasn’t. Carson and Ellen came running. Mom died, basically leaving us orphans. What are we supposed to do now?
Author’s Note #2: (2014) My son came running when I gasped and yelled NO! I knew you could die on the jetpack, but I have never seen it before. I am with Judith. What are we supposed to now? Do I call it a failure or let you guys decide?
What pisses me off the most? I put 15 death flowers in Indigo’s inventory so that Marcy could go to the future without anything clogging it up.